We listed best Kenneth Parcell from 30 rock tv show.
1- “I get to go to heaven and receive my reward: 72 virgin, margaritas. Hold the salt.” – Kenneth Parcell
2- “I believe life is for the living. I believe in taking risks and biting off more than you can chew. And also, people were yelling and I got confused about the rules.” – Kenneth Parcell
3- “Adult? You mean like you’re driving a car and wearing a suit?” – Kenneth Parcell
4- “I like your top. I’m a real good sex person. I do it all the different ways.” – Kenneth Parcell
5- “Are you pickling squirrel meat? Cause I can lend you my skullpresser.” – Kenneth Parcell
6- “We lose half the congregation every time American Idol starts up.” – Kenneth Parcell
7- “Don’t get too attached, because once people realize his tonics don’t work, it’s on to the next town.” – Kenneth Parcell
8- “That lady you European-kissed last night was actually a gentleman.” – Kenneth Parcell
9- “It’s not enough that you killed the bird I’ve had for almost 60 years, but the fact that you didn’t trust me is unforgivable!” – Kenneth Parcell
10- “Fine, I will try the other location. But frankly, LaDonica, you have not been real helpful.” – Kenneth Parcell
11- “I feel like I’m in The Pelican Brief. Do I already know too much?” – Kenneth Parcell
12- “I don’t drink hot liquids of any kind. That’s the Devil’s temperature!” – Kenneth Parcell
13- “Yes, the rest of us talked about it last night at Finnegan’s, the bar we go to after work. In my dreams.” – Kenneth Parcell
14- “I love how it makes me feel. It’s like my heart is trying to hug my brain!” – Kenneth Parcell
15- “Ms. Lemon, you’re not supposed to be here; you’re on s-e-x probation.” – Kenneth Parcell
16- “There’s a whole channel on the cable that just tells you what’s on the other channels!” – Kenneth Parcell
17- “Oh, you mean my mouth radio.” – Kenneth Parcell
18- “I’m glad I’m not a white man, Mr. Donaghy… Is Spongebob Squarepants supposed to be terrifying?” – Kenneth Parcell
19- “If I have a strawberry, my throat closes up faster than a girl in math class.” – Kenneth Parcell
20- “I’ve had to send more money home lately. There are problems on the farm. After years of inbreeding the pigs are getting violent and the pig shield around the house has worn thin.” – Kenneth Parcell
21- “She went crazy. She bit off my nutsack, that I kept tied around my belt to feed the squirrels.” – Kenneth Parcell
22- “I feel all car sick inside.” – Kenneth Parcell
23- “Now you’re standing on the very spot where Grace Allen took Jack Parr’s virginity.” – Kenneth Parcell
24- “I wouldn’t have this job if it wasn’t for the mouth in my back.” – Kenneth Parcell
25- “Science was my most favorite subject, especially the Old Testament.” – Kenneth Parcell
26- “That’s “99 Red Balloons,” Nena’s famous anti-balloon protest song.” – Kenneth Parcell
27-” Bonus means extra. I know that. From game shows.” – Kenneth Parcell
28- “I can’t handle the truth!” – Kenneth Parcell
29- “As mom used to say, you can’t eat love.” – Kenneth Parcell
30- “When the Parcells first came to America, they lived in a town called Sexcriminalboat.” – Kenneth Parcell
31- “Mr. Donaghy, I wasn’t sure if you were going to participate in this year’s pumpkin carving contest or like last year I should go jump up my own ass.” – Kenneth Parcell
32- “At least he died doing what he loved most: blogging on the Huffington Post.” – Kenneth Parcell
33- “The usual, I suppose. Two hobos sharing a bean. Lady airline pilots.” – Kenneth Parcell
34- “Looks like you got a bad case of the chew-daddies. Ozark kisses? The woodsman’s companion?” – Kenneth Parcell
35- “I feel about as useless as a mom’s college degree.” – Kenneth Parcell
36- “Miss Maroney, your Mexican diet pills came. Should I start taking them to test their side effects?” – Kenneth Parcell
37- “Global warming? Sorry, sir, that’s just scientist talk. The same people who say my grandfather was a monkey. If that’s true, why was he killed by a monkey?” – Kenneth Parcell
38- “Well, they make our shoes and wallets.” – Kenneth Parcell
39- “An angry God is punishing them. It’s a Christmas miracle!” – Kenneth Parcell
40- “Sorry, sir, that happens sometimes when I unhinge my pelvis.” – Kenneth Parcell
41- “E-mailing images to address book? What is wrong with me?!?” – Kenneth Parcell
42- “Fort Myers and Cincinnati. Didn’t you learn your airport codes in high school?” – Kenneth Parcell
43- “You’ll have to ask the fella who whittled ’em for me!” – Kenneth Parcell
44- “They’re all named Sean, they’re mean, and I hate it here.” – Kenneth Parcell
45- “I am Silas Merrymount Peppercorn. This is my wife… Moronica.” – Kenneth Parcell
46- “You just enjoy your coffee, sir, while I tell you a funny story about my neighbor’s cat. His name is Mr. Wiggles, and his cat’s name is Benson.” – Kenneth Parcell
47- “It’s so romantic, like that movie I only saw the first few moments of, Fatal Attraction.” – Kenneth Parcell
48- “That’s wonderful. Even if he does come from a country that’s nothing more than the dried husk America came out of.” – Kenneth Parcell
49- “All these books, sir! It’s like I’m back at school, learning about the dangers of book-readin.” – Kenneth Parcell
50- “My cousin in Atlanta is a business model. She holds up staplers in catalogs.” – Kenneth Parcell
51- “Oh, Mr. Hornberger, always saying hate when he means love.” – Kenneth Parcell
52- “This is my dream come true! And to hear it from my best friend comma Bald category.” – Kenneth Parcell
53- “And he’ll understand because he’s my best friend comma beautiful hair category parentheses strong.” – Kenneth Parcell
54- “Let’s meet up later and smoke some drug cigarettes!” – Kenneth Parcell
55- “Everyone there smiles creepily, all the time. And that’s sort of my thing.” – Kenneth Parcell
56- “I don’t understand what you’re saying but I like that it has the word we in it.” – Kenneth Parcell
57- “You know my uncle was a tinkerer… until the FBI shot him.” – Kenneth Parcell
58- “Also, in the background I heard lady giggles and the sound of a beautiful sunset.” – Kenneth Parcell
59- “It was Harold, and I ate all of him. Even the face in case of a tie. I ate him sir! I ate my father pig!” – Kenneth Parcell
60- “Obesity is killing the African-American community… with laughter.” – Kenneth Parcell
61- “I hope I photograph okay, because when I look in a mirror there’s just a white haze.” – Kenneth Parcell
62- “I can talk to animals. Well not talk to ’em. I can take commands from them.” – Kenneth Parcell
63- “You don’t know the meaning of the word scared. And I know ’cause I’ve looked it up for you a dozen times.” – Kenneth Parcell
64- “What most people don’t know is that NBC is still a network.” – Kenneth Parcell
65- “When I first started working here, an 8-year-old Shirley Temple taught me how to roll a cigarette.” – Kenneth Parcell
66- “It just feels so good to have the Three Musketeers and Dot Com back together again.” – Kenneth Parcell
67- “You’re the one that makes us laugh. Never go away again.” – Kenneth Parcell
68- “Every year my aunt sends me a wool sweater for Christmas. We get it Aunt Alice. You’re a sheep.” – Kenneth Parcell
69- “It’s an old Parcell family recipe, but I like to replace the Union soldier meat with boiled potatoes.” – Kenneth Parcell
70- “I don’t like to swear sir, but no thank you.” – Kenneth Parcell
71- “I’m sorry I won’t be seeing you in heaven Mr. Spurlock, but on the bright side, black hell does have a juke box.” – Kenneth Parcell
72- “Is the sky blue? Well, until tomorrow, when it will be on fire.” – Kenneth Parcell
73- “In school, all you learn about Abraham Lincoln is that he was a gay alcoholic.” – Kenneth Parcell
74- “Didn’t you notice your food wasn’t pre-chewed?” – Kenneth Parcell
75- “Please get better sir. I’ve dug too many graves.” – Kenneth Parcell
76- “He’s the best friend I’ve ever had…tied with everyone I’ve ever met.” – Kenneth Parcell
77- “I’ve never crushed anyone, besides accused witches.” – Kenneth Parcell
78- “A Parcell man has never been called mister outside of an execution chamber.” – Kenneth Parcell
79- “My father wore this to his high school prom. The theme was Enchantment Under the Jim Crow Laws.” – Kenneth Parcell
80- “Oh my, it smells like Grandma’s house at Christmas. That’s when we found her dead on the toilet.” – Kenneth Parcell
81- “Look at us laughing together… like a couple of Jews watching The Daily Show.” – Kenneth Parcell
82- “I know the Woggles. My eight year old niece walked down the aisle to that song at her wedding.” – Kenneth Parcell
83- “She isn’t a bitch. She’s a meanie pants.” – Kenneth Parcell
84- “Why is he learning anything? He’s supposed to be God.” – Kenneth Parcell
85- “Delightful Charlie Chaplin. You have the mustache and everything.” – Kenneth Parcell
86- “Miss Lemon, your eyes look like my uncle’s after he would drink from the air conditioner.” – Kenneth Parcell
87- “Back in Stone Mountain, even the mayor had bedbugs. And she was a horse.” – Kenneth Parcell
88- “What would this country be if our economy didn’t allow wealthy people to take advantage of rubes?” – Kenneth Parcell
89- “This is a religious holiday. When has religion ever caused any trouble?” – Kenneth Parcell
90- “I love helping people less fortunate than me.” – Kenneth Parcell
91- “I’m in charge! Attention, everyone! All menstruating women go home immediately.” – Kenneth Parcell
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