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19 Best Jared Dunn Quotes – Silicon Valley

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Jared Dunn Quotes: Silicon Valley series is about the experiences of a computer programmer working in Silicon Valley in the late 1980s.

1- “I’ll go find some hoes to prioritize behind you.” – Jared Dunn

2- “Umm, what’s happening? Uh, I’m sorry, what? Mr. Car?” – Jared Dunn

3- “If we are going to change the name, we need to do it now. Names stick. My name’s only Jared because Gavin called me that on my first day. My real name is Donald.” – Jared Dunn

4- “Exactly. It’s like we’re the Beatles and now we just need Yoko.” – Jared Dunn

5- “I’ve always wanted to be part of a suicide pact.” – Jared Dunn

6- “There’s a distinct over-representation of men in this company. Look around. I think it would behoove us to prioritize hiring a woman.” – Jared Dunn

7- “It’s like when somebody says they want to go birding with you, but really they just want to get you alone in the woods, so they can take your binoculars.” – Jared Dunn

8- “Wow, he’s technically a cyborg.” – Jared Dunn

jared dunn silicon valley

9- “The only people who have used that term with me were assailants.” – Jared Dunn

10- “Hey! Sorry if I scared you, I know I have somewhat ghost-like features. My uncle used to say, “You look like someone starved a virgin to death.” – Jared Dunn

11- “They just kept saying that if I didn’t waste so much money at the butthole doctor, then we’d have enough money, but I pay for all my medical out of pocket.” – Jared Dunn

12- “Okay, fine. But do you know who uses cubicles? Every single Fortune 500 company. Why? Because they work.” – Jared Dunn

13- “When Bill Gates got married on Lanai, he rented every helicopter on the Hawaiian islands so that paparazzi couldn’t use them to fly over. Although in that case, it was a positive, because now you can imagine that wedding however you want.” – Jared Dunn

14- “I think we need to define our corporate culture.” – Jared Dunn

15- “When Dinesh calls me retarded frankenstein, or he describes me as AIDS lady or Gilfoyle refers to me as effeminate k.d. lang, I know this is a joke among friends.” – Jared Dunn

jared dunn silicon valley

16- “Guys, does girth-similarity affect Erlich’s ability to jerk different dicks simultaneously?” – Jared Dunn

17- “No, those belong to an underaged kid that I brought to my house.” – Jared Dunn

18- “I like this new angry side of you. Being around angry people relaxes me because I know where I stand.” – Jared Dunn

19- “Well, I looked it up. It’s about a predatory flautist who murders children in a cave.” – Jared Dunn

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