1- “The Kitchen Debate with Richard Nixon. Richard M. Nixon. The M Train. Soul train. Chicken soup for the soul. Chicken soup. Soup kitchen. This is a Leap Day miracle!” -Tracy Jordan
2- “New dude is as good at singing as Tracy Jordan is at everything.” -Tracy Jordan
3- “Hang on, have you not left this building since you were mugged?” -Tracy Jordan
4- “Grizz, when was the last time you told your fiance you love her? Since the phone call I interrupted to make this announcement!” -Tracy Jordan
5- “I want you to call my phone so I can hear the chicken dance again.” -Tracy Jordan
6- “I know it’s a girl, Liz Lemon. Because I yelled, ”Susan B. Anthony” at the moment of conception.” -Tracy Jordan
7- “Pay attention to me LL or else I’m going to do something self-destructive. For example, I just got an honorary sheriff’s badge and I’m going to start making real arrests.” -Tracy Jordan
8- “Oh sure! Ladysmith Black Mambazo, Paul Simon, Invictus.” -Tracy Jordan
9- “What can l do? l’m on my grind. l’m gonna have so much money my grandkids are gonna play lacrosse. Lacrosse, Liz Lemon.” -Tracy Jordan
10- “Oh, yeah. There’s a garbage bag in the hallway with a reef shark in it. Just put him in the tub with a reef. what’s for dinner tonight? I want pierogies.” -Tracy Jordan
11- “Don’t go, Liz Lemon ! There’s still an after-after- after-after-after party! l just got to take my kids to soccer first! Hey, whose roof is this?” -Tracy Jordan
12- “There you are! Your Kenneth and I were worried sick about you!” -Tracy Jordan
13- “Well, I hope he makes me an across helmet so I don’t get hurt playing across. Now come on. That’s pretty solid for a guy who just came out of a hallucination.” -Tracy Jordan
14- “Sure, find a scapegoat. Just like John Hancock did with the good King George.” -Tracy Jordan
15- “That’s why my life is not like The Cosby Show. I only have boys. And boys are disgusting! I need a baby girl. Don’t patronize me! Stop laughing! It’s not funny! I need a baby girl! Don’t slit my vas deferens!” -Tracy Jordan
16- “Oh, hold on. Dotcom is confirming that he drowned.” -Tracy Jordan
17- “That’s what Danny was saying. We have to be cool to everybody. Because the future is like a Japanese game show. You have no idea what’s going on.” -Tracy Jordan
18- “Al Sharpton would renounce him at a press conference on the street because Al Sharpton doesn’t have an office.” -Tracy Jordan
19- “Always have been, always will be.” -Tracy Jordan
20- “You will be punished! Can I have my nunchuks back?” -Tracy Jordan
21- “Was Dotcom standing that gay?” -Tracy Jordan
22- “Congratulations. I am not interested in godfather duties.” -Tracy Jordan
23- “Fore! Hey guys! It’s me, Tracy! The black guy from work.” -Tracy Jordan
24- “Do they give an award for Tarantula Misplacement?” -Tracy Jordan
25- “So how are you feeling? Any arm pain? Shortness of breath? Plans to investigate corruption in Russia?” -Tracy Jordan
26- “Never better. I’m as happy as a clam who wants to kill some woman.” -Tracy Jordan
27- “Does anyone want to be my friend? I’m normal!” -Tracy Jordan
28- “Let’s do it again from the top. I want to get it perfect, because perfection is my middle name. “Unclaimed Perfection Baby Boy.” -Tracy Jordan
29- “I would like some chicken nuggets, a beer, and some of my wife’s rice, to stay.” -Tracy Jordan
30- “You know, I’ve been wanting to say this for a few seconds now. This workplace has become a hotbed of old school racism.” -Tracy Jordan
31- “You look regular. Can I guess your name? Is it Pedro? Is it Craigford? Is it Swimming?” -Tracy Jordan
32- “You’re going to pour glue in the lock. That’s how my kids keep me out of the liquor cabinet.” -Tracy Jordan
33- “Hello, fellow human being. would you like to ask me what time it is?” -Tracy Jordan
34- “Don’t throw a party for vengeance. It will turn on you. Like your wife, after your kid has fallen into a quarry.” -Tracy Jordan
35- “I can’t eat this, I’m a foodie.” -Tracy Jordan
36- “To be honest, I couldn’t really understand anything Rick James was saying.” -Tracy Jordan
37- “There are tears falling on her boobies, Liz Lemon.” -Tracy Jordan
38- Well, I yelled ”Baba Booey” at Walter Cronkite’s funeral, so I actually have no idea of what’s rude or not. -Tracy Jordan
39- “Why don’t you shut your mouth, back that ass up, and make me a sandwich.” -Tracy Jordan
40- “Goodnight! Stay tuned for a special Mother’s Day edition of Bitch Hunter!” -Tracy Jordan
41- “Is it me, or is Liz Lemon getting hotter?” -Tracy Jordan
42- “A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy’s!” -Tracy Jordan
43- “Great, I’ll be in touch. You still using your Hotmail account?” -Tracy Jordan
44- “Why did you bring me here? I blocked all this stuff out for a reason. Oh, Lord! Some guy with dreads electrocuted my fish!” -Tracy Jordan
45- “Sure, I know him from the secret black people meetings. Nah, I’m just kidding. He’s not invited. But who’s ”EGOT”?” -Tracy Jordan
46- “It’s all coming back to me. Oh, my God! I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs.” -Tracy Jordan
47- “There was a better kid’s birthday party up the street.” -Tracy Jordan
48- “If you’ve learned anything from me, it’s how to do a bad job. Go, honor me. Save yourself. But first, get me a sandwich.” -Tracy Jordan
49- “I’m glad you feel that way. Because Angie’s on her way up, and I want you to tell her for me.” -Tracy Jordan
50- “I studied fried chicken at the school of hard knocks. Ain’t that right, Mr. Jack?” -Tracy Jordan
The post Best 50 Tracy Jordan Quotes appeared first on NSF - Music Magazine.