jeff winger quotes
“Oh, like you’re famous for your wit.” – Jeff Winger
“Well, it’s been real, but I have a date to catch. Or should I say.. A catch to date.” – Jeff Winger
“Why are we in such a rush to leave the tide pool when the only things waiting for us on shore are the sands of time and the hungry seagulls of slowly growing apart?” – Jeff Winger
“These people don’t want me to say what I’ll do, they want me to do what I’ll say!” – Jeff Winger
“I settled on a thruth today that is always going to be true: that I’ll do anything for my friends. – Jeff Winger
“We’re the only species on Earth that observes Shark Week” – Jeff Winger
“I’m prepared for any insane adventure life throws our way and I don’t know about you, but I’m looking forward to every one of them.” – Jeff Winger
“Don’t talk to me about romance. I had a three way in a hot air balloon.” – Jeff Winger
“I don’t step u to being a leader. I reluctantly accept it when it’s thrust upon me.” – Jeff Winger
“Hey, did you hear about the turtle in China? Two packs a day!” – Jeff Winger
“I’m no politician I’m just a fella, I think that beer should be cold, and boots should be dusty. I think 9-11 was bad. And freedom? well, I think that’s just a little bit better.” – Jeff Winger
“I’m no sociopath. I always know that what I’m doing is wrong. I’m just a guy who doesn’t like taking tests, doing work, and getting yelled at. So if you think about it, I’m the sanest person here.” – Jeff Winger
“The next person that offers me pity will be mentioned by name in my suicide note” – Jeff Winger
“I discovered at a very early age that if I talked long enough, I could make anything right or wrong. So either I’m god, or thruth is relative. Either way: Booyah.” – Jeff Winger
“It’s a locomotive that runs on us!” – Jeff Winger
“Haul it, ball it, never call it. Girls are objects.” – Jeff Winger
“If crazy people can’t be at [school name], then where are we supposed to go?” – Jeff Winger
“What am I not good at?” – Jeff Winger
“It’s called chemistry, I have it with everybody!” – Jeff Winger
“Look at me. It’s clear to you that I am awesome, but I can never admit that, because that would make me an ass.” – Jeff Winger
“Never listen to Pierce.” – Jeff Winger
“To victory, it feels unfamiliar but it tastes like chicken” – Jeff Winger
“Can’t you be cool like me?” – Jeff Winger
“I don’t have an ego. My Facebook photo is a landscape.” – Jeff Winger
“TV’s the best dad there is. TV never came home drunk, Tv never forgot me at the zoo, TV never abused and insulted me.. unless you count Cop Rock.” – Jeff Winger
“We’re the only species on earth that observes shark week.” – Jeff Winger
“Let’s do what people do. Let’s get a house we can’t afford and a dog that makes us angry.” – Jeff Winger
“I see your value now.” – Jeff Winger
“Helping only ourselves is bad and helping each other is good.” – Jeff Winger
“Doing more than the minimum amount of work is my definition of failing.” – Jeff Winger
“Harrison Ford is irradiating our testicles with microwave satellite transmissions!” – Jeff Winger
“I’m Neo in the third act of The Matrix. I’m also Neo in the first act of the second Matrix.” – Jeff Winger
“You are all better than you think you are, you are just designed not to believe it when you hear it from yourself.” – Jeff Winger
“I regret nothing” – Jeff Winger
“All right, knock it off. No one at this school should pick on any class of people. It’s like watching magicians bully jugglers.” – Jeff Winger
“The next person that offers me charity or pity will be mentioned, by name, in my suicide note.” – Jeff Winger